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January 26, 2005

I'm starting to miss things.

Even in a successful fight with cancer, you lose things along the way. I made a long list once of things I missed in my roughly 8-year struggle (on and off) with cancer last time.

It seems I'm going to have to start a new list.

Before I've even had my first chemotherapy treatment, already...

...I miss walking the dog. I would take her on long walks at least two and sometimes three times a day. We'd go up the hill and across the ball field, into the woods. Sometimes, we'd go to the park for even longer walks. Now, I can't get a quarter-mile from the house without coughing and feeling run down.

...I miss school. One semester away from graduating. I was coming to terms with saying goodbye to everyone at graduation and moving on in life. Now, not only will I not be in school this semester, I won't have a chance to see the gang at all. No papers, no books, no lectures by Dr. Herzog, no lunchroom discussions.

...I miss being a pastor to the people in my church. Before, after over a year with my current congregation, folks were finally opening up, coming to my office and sharing their needs and concerns. We would talk and pray and I felt useful. Now, it's like there's a barrier between the congregation and me. Nobody wants to bring their problems to the pastor who has cancer. I guess it makes sense - they must be thinking their problems seem small next to cancer, or that I must be too sick to help - but it is my calling, and I miss it.

...I miss chocolate milk shakes.

...I miss my friend Robyn. You get used to having people around, and you take them for granted. Every week I drove up to school last semester, it was understood that at least one night each trip, we'd go to a restaurant or somesuch and just sit and talk. I got to at least visit everyone else I consider family over the Christmas break, when we went home to Virginia. Mostly, I miss the talks.

I'm pretty sure there are other things, but that's it for now. I'm not all depressed or anything, but it is healthy to miss those things which you care about when they are taken from you.

I guess it gives you something to fight for.

Posted by Dan at January 26, 2005 08:51 AM

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Would you please send me your home address and phone number? How is your mom and dad and sister doing?
Eddie and Brooks talked with Scott the other night and he told them about his wife leaving him. We were so shocked. Believe it or not we still talk about the three musketeers, Danny, Jim and Scott and the good times we had while ya'll were at the BSU at ODU. We always say we would love to see ya'll and know what is going on in your lives. I would love to hear you give a sermon, it must be super.
Is there anything we can do for you or Stephanie? Sending you a book, GIVE MONEY, whatever? I hope that your church people will still come to you when they need counsel, sometimes they will get what they need and so will you. Do you remember Heidi Oberdick? She is our Minister of Music at Talbot Park for the last 4 or 5 years. She is wonderful and we are grateful that she came to us.

I understand exactly how you are feeling. I have had three back surgeries in a year and I have just come back to work. My cancer reoccurred in the lung but so far the oncologist says everthing is working fine. That was a 13 year span between cancers. What hospital are you in? Please email or call us at (xxx) xxx-xxxx (H) or (xxx) xxx-xxxx (W).

Posted by: Linda Mihilasky at January 26, 2005 10:52 AM

I'll put a bow around this one for you Dan.
As for the three mentioned above; living, dead, and dead, in that order. I'll give you a call Mrs. Milhilasky. :) Jim

Posted by: Jim at January 26, 2005 12:27 PM

What's next? Pena Coladas? Making love at midnight?
Wait a minute! I've got a tune going through my head. I just might be able to put this all together in a song and have a one hit wonder! No. Wait. Nobody would listen to a song that was that stupid to believe a couple could stay together after that. It would never work.

Posted by: Jim at January 26, 2005 12:41 PM


That was a kind of funny idea for a song. We both want to cheat on each other, so let's stay together!

Still, I really miss chocolate milk shakes.

Posted by: Big Dan at January 26, 2005 02:58 PM

I miss the late night cruises through Jeffrey Wilson homes . . . Forget I said that

Posted by: Scott at January 26, 2005 08:07 PM

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