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March 26, 2005

Popping Cancer: Reflection

Right now, I don't have any hair on my head. My facial hair is growing in patchy, smooth here, thick there. I can't speak two sentences without starting to cough and I tend to spend most of my days either napping or sitting in the same chair under the same blanket watching television. I am pale and weak and I'm losing weight.

Not exactly the description of someone you'd flirt with from across the room or strike up a conversation with on the bus, is it?

I can see how some folks would be driven to depression by these circumstances, but I know who I am. I know that being ragged and torn is not always a bad thing. I know that I am loved.

AND I own a copy of The Velveteen Rabbit. Let me share this exerpt with you.

"Real isn't how you are made. It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real... It doesn't happen all at once. You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

I know that I am loved. See? There's no way cancer can win, no matter what the final result.

Just keeping it Real.

Posted by Dan at March 26, 2005 04:15 PM

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That is one of the most beautiful blog posts I have ever read. Hope you don't mind a stranger getting all sentimental on you, but truly--beautiful.

Posted by: nina at March 26, 2005 06:00 PM

Hi, Big Dan, I'm a visitor from Sheilaworld. I've read and enjoyed your posts on many occasions. I don't know if you'd mind, but I'm sending a big bear hug to you right this minute. I guess some people would call it a prayer. I just think of it as a telepathic snuggle blanket. So here goes! MMMMMMNNNNNGGGGHH!

Posted by: Stevie at March 26, 2005 07:12 PM

He is risen! For you and for me. My dear classmate, you are in my prayers continuously. Your outward personna is one of inspirational hope; your inward being is known to Him.
God bless!

Posted by: Pam at March 27, 2005 08:55 PM

You are loved.

Posted by: Bonnie at March 28, 2005 04:47 AM


I know a little girl who has a very unrecognizable tattered 'Puffy' who is her lifeline and is very real and very loved by her and by me. You are loved no matter what. Isn't this what resurrection is all about? The almost unimaginable love that could ever exist. Thank you for your reflections, your comedy, but most of all the hope that you bring to me. You are always in my prayers.

Posted by: Carla at March 28, 2005 07:38 AM

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