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May 04, 2005

The very bad news.

Cancer has one trick, but it plays it over and over. I have personally fallen for it in my lifetime at least a dozen times. I know that sounds like an exaggeration, but feel free to let me know and I'll probably be able to list 15 times off the top of my head. The point is, I can't believe I fell for it again. The trick? Cancer dangles hope, then snatches it away.

Elwood the cat was breathing hard by last night. Today, after I got home from getting my own poison from the chemotherapy doctor, Mrs. Popping Culture returned Elwood to the veterinarian. A bone marrow test showed that his leukemia was active. The doctor said he would live between one and three days and that he was suffering. We had the doctor end his life so that he wouldn't suffer any more.

One of the worst parts was that I wasn't able to be there with him. While he was dying, I was in bed fighting off the umpteenth wave of nausea. While Mrs. Popping Culture and a friend buried him, I was twisting in bed from a severe series of abdomen and leg cramps. (PS prayer request: somewhere in the cramps I twisted my knee wrong and can hardly walk on it. Seems a bit trivial, all things considered.) There are very few things I wouldn't have given to be there with him and Mrs. Popping Culture. Please keep her in your thoughts.

Chemotherapy is a jerk.

Cancer is a jerk.

I miss Elwood the cat.

Posted by Dan at May 4, 2005 09:51 PM

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Comments

Oh God, Dan, I am terribly sorry. Just so so very sorry. Words can't express what I mean. You guys are getting slammed right now, and it sucks. I am so sorry about Elwood. He sounds like he was a wonderful cat.

Posted by: red at May 5, 2005 12:00 AM

Guh. Losing a pet just sucks beyond belief, and it must be so much worse at this time. Sorry Dan. Screw cancer.

Oh, and I'm glad that the tumors aren't growing. Sounds like good news to me. Now let's get on with the shrinking of them.

Posted by: Joel Caris at May 5, 2005 03:39 AM

I'm sorry Dan. FeLV is an awful disease and it's terrible that Elwood was taken from you.
As always, you and Mrs. P.C. are in my prayers.

Posted by: Kimm at May 5, 2005 03:59 AM

Writing this with tears in my eyes, Dan. Losing a four-legged friend, anytime, is devastating; but you and Mrs. P.C. have really got the double whammy. My heart, with all these other friends', goes out to you.

Posted by: Gail at May 5, 2005 08:37 AM

You'll see him again. I know it. In the meantime, tell your friends some Elwood stories.

Posted by: Ara at May 5, 2005 09:18 AM

I can't even imagine the sorrow both you and Mrs. P.C. are feeling right now. My heart and prayers go out to both of you now and always.

Posted by: Carla at May 5, 2005 10:26 AM

Please accept my condolences. You loved Elwood and gave him a great life. I hope you remember the good times.

Posted by: Julia at May 5, 2005 10:59 AM

I'm so sorry for both of you! I'll bet cat heaven is a really fun place. Maybe he can hang out with Chuck and Matty. Love you!

Posted by: Bonnie at May 5, 2005 11:22 AM

So so sorry Dan....of course it was right to put him out of his misery but it is still so very hard. Ive been there with a dog I loved very much. It happens very quickly and quietly and that is a blessing....they arent scared...I think they dont have that sort of innate fear that humans suffer from. Concentrate on the good...it is hard to find sometimes but it is there....and we are all praying for you guys. Get through today and tomorrow get through tomorrow.

Posted by: jo at May 5, 2005 11:25 AM

Elwood is no longer in pain. I'm so sorry for your loss, Dan. There's a huge hole in your life when you lose part of the family. I'm really, really sorry.

Posted by: Alex at May 6, 2005 02:15 PM

Dan:

As I write this, Rummy is sleeping on my desk in front of me and Bogie is dozing in the crook of my left arm (even though he is anything but light and my left hand is now completely asleep), purring like a little Harley. I am truly sorry for your loss.

Posted by: Jheka at May 7, 2005 02:07 AM

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